No, not me. No
worries.
This was from a co-worker
yesterday during lunch. At the table
were three other co-workers: my friend who quit drinking when I did, another
lady, and a male co-worker. The
conversation continued with how of course you don’t eat when you’re drinking
dinner because you know “the calories.” My friend, the one who’s quit,
commented that this really is not all that healthy, and she was shot down by
our other co-worker with the “drinking and eating is just too many calories!" mantra. The
conversation went on for a while, but I chose to remain quiet. So did my friend after her one comment.
The sad part is, every single person at the table knew that
my friend and I have stopped drinking. And we’ve told them why. Yet on the
conversation goes about great drinking is.
I have another co-worker who at least every other day tells
me how crazy I am for stopping and that I need to go home and have a bottle of
wine.
What I Learned: My
co-workers are nuts, but I enjoy them anyway! And I shouldn’t judge the
drinking of others just because I have a drinking problem. Nor should I listen to them when they tell me to drink wine! (Yeah, that last one is a bit on the obvious side.)
Other people just don't understand. Sometimes I think they are being insensitive but honestly, they just don't get it or realise that what they are saying is not helpful. You are doing great! A x
ReplyDeleteThanks Angie! I agree; most of them just don't understand, especially my friend who keeps telling me to relax and drink wine. She's a sweetie, and she would never try to hurt me on purpose. I think my other co-worker is on her way to a drinking problem, but that's what I'm trying really hard to not judge. Her business is her's, not mine.
DeleteThose who drink just don't understand those who either want to stop or have stopped. It is not that easy to stop drinking. It is not easy to relax and have a bottle. Because there is this black hole that awaits us on the bottom of that bottle.
ReplyDeletePeople either don't understand, or they kind of know they have a peobl m and are trying to justify their own actions to themselves.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I listen. I never tell my own stories about drinking any more. If anything, I just say been there, glad I'm not any more.
It is sad how ingrained excessive drinking is accepted. If they decided to talk about smoking crack on the weekend no one would laugh.
Good for you - the old 'smile and nod' is a great route to take with folks who don't get it. I've been using a one-liner response recently that has been surprisingly effective at stopping people in their tracks, maybe because the underlying message is obvious and serious, yet unspoken: Friend: "Why did you stop drinking?" Me: "I got too good at it."
ReplyDeleteYes, I have a sister in law, who offers me beer instead of wine, as she says there's "not enough alcohol in beer to worry about it". I've stopped bothering to explain. Actually I stopped spending any time with her at all, but that's not an option with co-workers, I guess.....I agree, the "smile and nod" approach works xx
ReplyDeleteThere is plenty of anecdotal evidence that some adults aren't as careful or responsible as they should be when it comes to alcohol and young people. And people from their childhood taking drug and alcohol at regular basis and thus make it a habit...they become addicted...
ReplyDeleteRehab Indianapolis